Friday, January 30, 2009

I've finally one-upped Mary Poppins

The origins of this post started two nights ago, when I woke in the middle of the night with an intense leg cramp.

It HURT.

I hadn't had one in years!!

I find when I'm good about taking vitamins and getting plenty of potassium and fruits, that I don't have leg cramps at all.

Then I remembered my grandmother a sweet lady who-shall-not-be-named, mentioned that older folks suffer leg cramps. And she discovered, through the elderly grape vine, that if you put a bar of soap under your sheets, that they go away. She tried it, and it worked. Now she sleeps with soap in her sheets.

huh.

Then, on the NPR the other day, I heard them talking about leg cramps.
And how a teaspoon of mustard every day keep the leg cramps away.

huh.

A lady called into the show and said it worked for her. She had taken to eating everything in mustard lately. Lots and lots of mustard.

Then I thought...well, shoot, maybe I should try these two things.
But, then, I don't get the leg cramps enough to really tell if it was working or not...

Who knows what else mustard could do if we added it to our diets regularly?
Maybe it could increase night vision in our troops.
I'm sending a few hundred jars to experiment.
I'm sure they won't mind.





Then I found on Wiki that mustard plasters are used in Russia where they think it stimulates the immune system and relieves pain.

Maybe mustard in my hair every night would make it silky smooth with no tangles?
I might try it.

Maybe mustard applied in our nether regions could help people who have trouble getting pregnant, conceive! Think of the thousands they could save in fertility testings and treatment if only they had a jar of mustard?!

Who knows what I could discover!!

But maybe A teaspoon of mustard would help the medicine go down?
In the most delightful way.





What do you think?
How can mustard help you?
Any fun home remedies to share?





***I am not a doctor and should not give out medical advice. Please do not try any of these ideas at home. Ignore me completely, I am a cracked lunatic with no medical training whatsoever.




34 comments:

Rudee said...

I don't know about all that, but I find a spoonful of mustard makes the sandwich taste great. I order mine from a German deli in Dallas. huh.

Rechelle said...

Mustard is good.

Kori said...

A teaspoon of grape jelly cures long lasting hiccups.

That's the only home remedy I know because I had some seriously long hiccup spells when I was pregnant with both of my boys. I read it in a book and now I swear by it if hiccups happen to strike.

Oh and mustard is yummy.

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

I know back in the day they used mustard plasters or poultices for different things... so there may be something to this mustard stuff.

Britt said...

The only thing mustard could cure me of would be settled stomach .. because that stuff would surely make me puke. =-)

Mama Dawg said...

Gag.....a teaspoonful of mustard? Without a hot dog or a hamburger?

Blech.....but, you may have caught on to something!

Dan River Mama said...

I read somewhere to take a spoonful of mustard for acid indigestion. I tried it once. The indigestion went away! Whether it was the mustard that worked or the half gallon of sweet tea I had to wash it down with, I'll never know...

Valarie Lea said...

Well you can take a spoonful of vinegar and keep Arthritis away. So they say. Crap I just rhymed. :)

Allie said...

All mustard does to me is make me pass gas. But I do love it, so I will eat it anyways.

When my husband lived in Ecuador, they used small pieces of paper stuck to the forehead with spit to relieve hiccups.

When I worked at a health food store, we sold magnesium/potassium/calcium supplements for cramps. But you have to take all three together.

But why in the world would you listen to me? After all, I just mentioned passing gas and spit wads on the forehead.

Indy said...

I will try the mustard. When I am pregnant, I get the worst leg cramps and nothing else has worked. I don't really like mustard but I hate leg cramps more. If they start up again, I will try your remedy. The soap, I may just do that tonight since it won't kill me. Thanks!

Trannyhead said...

Heh - I've always heard to eat lots of bananas for the potassium. Maybe you should put mustard on the bananas. *chuckle*

BedsideTalesMan said...

what have you been smokin today girl?

You crack me up.

scargosun said...

Makes sense and I might try it. :) I don't think I have any home remedies that work but I do still like honey and lemon for a sore throat. :)

Lula! said...

This entire post is pure win. I mean, it's GOLD, Rhea. I love it.

And I love mustard. I hate leg cramps.

We shall discuss mustard & Mary Poppins together. Very soon. Like...VERY soon. Awesome.

only a movie said...

hey - I sometimes get leg cramps at night. Step on a wet washcloth. I usually works for me.

Kelly said...

A friend of mine HATED mustard until she got Preggers and then she couldn't get enough of it!

Krystyn said...

I don't have any fun cures....and I don't like mustard, either!

I say eat a banana and call it a day.

Michelle said...

I've heard pickle juice is good for muscle cramps, too.

The Cotton Wife said...

Now I want a hotdog.

Miss Anne said...

i love mustard.
i wasn't aware of it's medical miracles! Bonus for me!

:)

DRINK ALOT OF WATER for those leg cramps! and eat a banana too!



p.s. did you get my email?

Susie said...

I have never heard of those! That's great:-)

Jen said...

Um yeah mustard won't help with leg cramps. Calcium on the other hand will and that is from a medical professional. ;)

Justine said...

A bar of soap in the bed? That's the biggest crock I've ever heard! ROFL! And the mustard is pretty funny too actually. Leg cramps? Eat a friggin' banana!

Justine :o )

Me said...

Soap? Mustard? Mary Poppins? Really ... Soap? I get leg cramps all the time

Linda said...

You crack me up. But yeah, my aunt told me about the bar of soap under the sheets thing. She swears it works. But I'm not sure I get it ... exactly where under the sheet do you put the darn thing? So your crampy leg is laying on it? I don't buy it. I mean literally. I don't use bar soap, I use shower gel. How would that work? LOL Plus, I can only tolerate mustard on German sausages. But I bet you could make a fortune if you bottled your own special treatment mustard. Good luck with that.

Tabitha Blue said...

Haha, how great are those old stories and theories!!

My mom put mustard on a bee sting of mine to help the stinging go away. I really can't remember if it worked. I was a pretty dramatic child and probably just cried anyway.

:)
~Tabitha~

freshmommyblog.com

Misty Dawn said...

*in her most whiny voice* But Rhhhhhea~ I don't like mustard! Can't we make it Miracle Whip instead?!?!

Sally-Ann said...

My mother believed that a good tablespoon of cod liver oil would cure all that ailed you. Would not recommend it, it is yukky with a capitol Y. Will have to try mustard, I get terrible leg cramps at night. Usually results in me shouting, "Ow, ow, ow," and springing out of bed, my hubby applying pressure to the heel of my foot so I can flex my calf. I think he will be overjoyed if the mustard works!

smith kaich jones said...

My mother swears that a bar of soap in the bed relieves her Restless Legs Syndrome. She only told me about this because she was afraid that if she died in her sleep one night, I would wonder what on Earth she was doing with that soap!

:) Debi

WheresMyAngels said...

Oh funny. My Uncle, believed vinigar cured everything! He drank it straight, he cooked with it, bathed with it and probably even slept on it!

Cristin said...

Funny, I was making Graham a mustard sandwich (yep, just mustard and bread, the kid is strange) this morning and was gagging at the smell of mustard...I hate the stuff...

Now my remedy for whatever ails you will be of no surprise to you... no, not that one... the legal one.... wine!

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

Love mustard, and love your ideas. Great blog! Stopping by from SITS for the Saturday sharefest!!

Crafty Girls Workshop said...

Yuck, mustard is gross with or without hotdogs or anything! yuck! I'd prefer sugar anyday. I'm stopping by to say Happy SITS SUper post Saturday! Oh, and I am from Texas too! San Antonio, in fact.

Anna

Rachel C. said...

Love this article! I found you through SITS, and I gotta say - congrats on your big day!

Mustard, Apple cider vinegar, and peanut butter (not always mixed together) are my top three go-to options when I need a home remedy for one thing or another.