Thursday, September 18, 2008

Job Interview - Part 2


OK, where was I?

Oh, yeah. Gut cramps. Sweat. Bad feeling.

We sat down across from each other on leather couches. As I tried to settle in and look professional, my squirming produced a "tasteless" noise. I didn't actually toot, it just sounded like it. Honest.

I really hoped he understood that.

For the rest of the interview, I sat as still as a statue...which is very hard for me. I think I like to change positions a lot. (no bad jokes here, please)

If the sitting still so as not to make a farting noise, sweat and gut cramps weren't enough, the questions began (Tell me about a work situation you had that required excellent communication skills.)...and I swear every single one of my answers started with this phrase: "Well, I haven't really had this experience, but the closest I can come to it is this..."

I swear.

Holy heck.

I was pulling answers out my hiney...honest and creative answers/solutions to the hypotheticals he suggested, but probably not exactly the answers he was looking for.

He took notes. Probably so he could laugh at my answers later with his friends.

My job history has no customer service...I've worked summer jobs as a teen in law office and dental office...I volunteered at children's hospitals and in ICU's. I currently coach a children's soccer team. I've been a nanny, a medical transcriptionist and am currently free lance writer.

I put myself out there, honestly and wholeheartedly, but no one wants me yet. It's a tough feeling. Exposing your self, like running naked through the mall (I hate the mall), and then having everyone ignore you...begging for attention and getting none.

I'm holding out hope the right job is out there for me. Somewhere.

I haven't heard back from "Dick" Jones.

I do have another job interview elsewhere today. Wish me luck.



39 comments:

Elaine A. said...

I HATE those questions about, "tell me about a time..." Note to self: try to remember those times...

I am sure you were fine. I detest job interviews myself! UGH!

scargosun said...

That was totally mean, sitting you on a leather couch. I am serious.

Susie said...

Oh Yuck!! I hate job interviews!! Hate it!! Good luck! I hope you find something soon:-)

Amy said...

Good luck! You will get the one you were meant to have, keep your head up and stay positive :D

Mama Dawg said...

I hate interviews.

You know, you could get real creative describing customer service skills for the jobs you have held.

TentCamper said...

Good luck my dear!!!!

I am looking for a job right now too. The market sucks and I am either overqualified or don't have the right experience. This sucks!!!!!

TentCamper said...

Oh....and I like to change positions a lot to.

Karen said...

Good luck Rhea! I'm sure you will find the right fit.

Every job I ever got, when I went to the interview, I honestly felt like I could care less if I got the job or not. The jobs that I went in really wanting I never got. What is up with that? My BFF is currently looking for a job feeling the same way you are.

Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Britt said...

When I sit on farty furniture, I make sure to move even more just to show all those around me that it wasn't my hiney but the furniture making those noises. I'm not sure if it works .. maybe they just think I have astronmical amounts of gas *shrug*

If you haven't found anyone that wants you, that just means you haven't found a place good enough for you to work at! Keep your head up! :o)

Oh, and try running naked through Wal-Mart .. wait, never mind. We that shop at Wal-Mart have seen it all. Go to Target! You might even get thrown out! Bonus points!! ;o)

Insane Mama said...

I'm all about changing positions :) I hate job interviews too you throw yourself out there and then what? YOu have to wait for that call...argh. It's almost like having your car stolen

Lula! said...

You said "toot" and "positions" in the first few paragraphs. And I was laughing.

And then I got to the end and felt all sad. There is a job out there for you. Please don't think I'm being flippant when I say this, but I hope that job requires you to don that pink hat and those pink boots. Seriously. It's just YOU, ya know?

mommaof4wife2r said...

interviewing...oh i dread that! good luck with the interview today...and i wanna know how it went!

CrystalChick said...

changing positions, sweats, leather couches, tooting.... OMG I'm having a flashback to something....
I'll be back to read the rest when I stop either laughing or reminiscing...

Karen said...

Best of luck. I'm keeping my fingers and my toes and my eyes and oter body parts, firmly crossed for you, ok !!

I hate those tooting couches and chairs. I always seem to end up in one of those...

American in Norway said...

Good luck...good luck...good luck...

hang in there... it will all work out for you! Hugs-

Kat said...

Changing postions keeps things new and interesting.

You really didn't want to work there anyway. And I am glad you have another interview today. Is this somewhere you'd want to work??

We need to find you a job where you can write interview questions...

Maybe you can go back and ask Dick if you can write the questions for his next job interview...

Living on the Spit said...

Good luck Rhea! Just be yourself and don't worry about the bozo's doing the interviewing...you can interview well but do a crappy job and then again you can do crappy at interviews and be an outstanding employee...I would have farted loudly and laughed and then said, "I'm sorry, twat did you say?"

only a movie said...

Good luck - I'm sure you'll find something that is the right fit. You are refining your interviewing techniques at this point.

Jennifer and Sandi said...

I (we) wish you LUCK TODAY!!!!

- Jennifer

Live.Love.Eat said...

Don't worry. Each interview is like practice. You will get better with each one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All Things BD said...

Good luck on the next one. The right opportunity will come along just when you need it.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

OMGOSH I hate squeaky chairs...I swear they do that so that they can have a laugh later...I love the part where you say "I sat still as a statue"...I can just imagine! :)

KP said...

:( i'm sure it wasn't THAT bad... and if it was... at least you gained some experience! don't let stuffy old man get you down.

good luck on your next one!

only a movie said...

Rhea - just wanted to let you know that Cristin and G-man are home and I'm sure she'll post soon (she needs to sleep)

Justine said...

Well thank goodness you told us the rest of the story! The second you said leather couches I knew what was coming! ROFL! You poor, humiliated thing you! Don't worry, you'll get a job. I don't know why you want one, but you'll get one!

Justine :o )

Jen said...

Don't let it get to you. It can only get better from here. You will find that right job, I just know it. Besides, you would not want to work for that guy anyway.

Krystyn said...

Well, I'm late, so I hope it went well!

Those questions are tough even if you do have the experience! The right job will come along!

Weith Kick said...

One of my favorite jobs I had was as a recruiter for a large credit card company. All I did all day was interview people for a job in the credit card call center. I loved it, interviewing people and talking to them and asking them questions. I know it's hard to be interviewed, people were always telling me how nervous they were. If you're not already doing this, whenever possible in the interview SMILE! And if you can, practice your interviewing skills with someone. Like do a mock interview. Or interview yourself and ask yourself questions. There are a zillion books at the library about how to interview and they come with interview questions. Check one out on "how to interview." Good luck!

Lane Boyz Mom said...

Well if Dick doesn't call you, maybe Rick will;) LOL

Good luck, Sweetie...you'll find something!

Shannon said...

Interviews suck... why do they have to be so darn nerve-wracking?



And I think the only way I am going to be Kat's Top Commenter is if I go back to a bunch of her old posts and just start leaving random comments.

Angie's Spot said...

Man, I hate the interview process. From both sides. I always feel like the biggest ass when answering questions and feel like a jerk when I'm interviewing people. Keeping my fingers crossed for ya! The right opportunity will come along that will be a good fit for you, I'm sure. :-)

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Good luck, I'm sure you'll find the right job for you!

Indy said...

After being at home, I don't think I could have come up with any answers. I am sweating for you just reading this. Hang in there and don't beat yourself up. When I was in grad school, they said it takes 99 no's to get to that one yes. You have 98 more to go. Go get 'em.

carrielt said...

I hate the questions: What's your strenghts? weaknesses? But I always pull something out of my ass.

Good luck with your job hunt!

angie said...

Oh my gosh. I love how you allowed us to see the humor in the situation, yet didn't make it all a comedy. Can't wait to hear more about what's out there for you!

Valarie said...

I hate job interviews. To me they are like confrontation. I don't deal well with confrontation. :(

Rela Pantaleon-Manigsaca said...

You've listed a couple of jobs there. So you actually got plenty of experience.

May I suggest that preparing for the potential questions may work for you - frame your previous experiences to "relate" to those questions and then practice saying it!

WheresMyAngels said...

It has been 11 years since I had to do one. Oh wait, I actually had to do it again 2 years ago when I interviewed for a supervisor job (yikes, forgot about that for a moment, had to have two different interviews). Today I know something that would of helped me back then. That is to pop a Valium 30 minutes before the interview! lol

Wishing you much luck!

Sandi McBride said...

I was filling out my application with the Sheriff's Department in our small town (large county, several small towns) and the line read: Name three people who have known you for over five years and to whom you are not related." Looking over at the Sheriff's secretary (my cousin) and the Chief Deputy (yes, cousin) and the Chief Magistrate (my Uncle) I told them "I'm on line 5, how bout I just skip this part." Hope you find the job suited to you and enjoy it as much as I enjoyed mine!
Sandi